Sick today. I have a bit of a cold or the flu or something. My stomach or bowls, not sure which, is feeling really ill in spurts, and then ok in spurts. I've already went to the washroom 20 times and it's only 3 in the afternoon. My eyes are leaking water from the cold and my bones are still aching. I don't know what they are aching from though, ulcers or having the cold. I am exhausted. I just want to sleep. I have to take my son to the optomitrist, just returned from bringing my daughter to get her US citizenship, we have a work appointment tonight at 6 and then our Home teachers are coming over at 8. Somehow I have to get dinner cooked in there. My daughter has ballet during the evening. She finishes ballet at 9:30 p.m. I told myself I wouldn't eat anything today to give my body a rest, but I ended up eating five or six cookies. They were whole wheat, cranberry, peacan, orange cookies I baked yesterday. I didn't eat anything else all day. I shouldn't have eaten that though.

I am scared to get my colon out. I have to try harder to eat more carefully and maybe there's a chance I can get my colon to calm down and keep it in my body. The thought of a hole in my body and crap falling out if it into a bag for three months and operations to crap through my small intenstine through my bum and close up the hole in my side makes me totally and completely sick. If it happens to other people, I don't really think about it, but if it happens to me, that's a totally different thing.